Action Coach, Career Coach, Hypnotherapy, Life Coach, Lifestyle, Performance Coach, Personal coaching, Self Help

Spot the difference

‘You’re a bit weird dad.’

 Once the searing honesty had subsided, I thought for a second about my eight year old’s pearl of wisdom.

‘Well, it’s good to a bit weird. I replied.

When she said this, I’d like to think she was referring to my love of Spandau Ballet. (Fair cop). But I sensed it was my commitment to an impression I was doing to make her laugh. It struck me afterwards about how we define ourselves and others as ‘weird’ or ‘not normal.’ Is it the job we do?  If you are a deep sea diver off the North Atlantic then you are in the minority compared to a factory worker. However both equally provide for an individual and their loved ones.  Is it our colleagues? The person who is socially awkward at work? Maybe they haven’t been given or shown the tools to cope in life? Is it our family? Why is one sibling totally different from the rest when given the same upbringing by their parents? It strikes me as ‘weird’ how quickly we see the difference in others without looking at our own oddities. . .

Why do we conform to being ‘normal’ or at the very least wanting to be perceived as normal? Must have kids. Must earn loads of money. Must get married. There is nothing wrong with any of those choices as long as they are your choices and they don’t come from a need or desire to fit in socially. So often we miss out on what is around us because we are consumed by where we aren’t, what we’re not earning, who we are not with. How much of our lives do we spend thinking about fitting in, instead of embracing who we really are?  I’d like to think we are all bit weird, we all have parts of us that we suppress out of embarrassment or fear. But the truth is, this is where our soul lies, it’s what makes us an individual. What makes you stand out? What makes you, you?

To cut a long story short.

It’s true,

I am weird.

If this sounds familiar, then drop me an email. I’d love to help.

Action Coach, Career Coach, Life Coach, Lifestyle, Performance Coach, Personal coaching, Self Help, Uncategorized

I say tomato, you say tomayto.

We often see things through the narrow prism of our own experience.  Our opinion and view of the world is of course the ‘right’ way to think, and we reinforce this belief by talking to other people with similar views to our own.  The difference we see in others can lead us to thinking our view is superior or others are not as enlightened as us. We see this a lot in politics at the moment, where the word democracy means different things to different people, depending on which side of the fence you sit on.

 So who is right – you or the other person? Leavers or remainers?  Or are we asking the wrong question? It’s very easy in life to frame our thinking and attitude around external things, the paper we read, the news we choose to listen to, the friends we surround ourselves with. How often do you hear people say “I believe in this view because it was how i was brought up”.  These are all examples of a way of thinking which takes away all our responsibility for independent thought. Can we not think for ourselves?  Sometimes It’s easy and more comforting to blame the other person or the other side rather than looking within.  However, we can’t grow and move forward if we don’t have a degree of self awareness and an ability to expand thinking outside of ‘what we know.’ The key here is this – in how many areas of our life do we limit ourselves and our opportunities because we quickly decide ‘they’re not like me’ before even putting ourselves in a position to find out?

The more we listen the more we learn, and maybe if we accept our differences and enhance our similarities our lives would be more fulfilled.

If this sounds familiar, drop me an email. I’d love to help